The Best Relationship Tips From Love & Hip Hop

Of course I watched the season finale of Love and Hip Hop New York last night!  There were so many relationship tips that I knew my BLUSH Beauties could benefit from some relationship lessons learned.  So here’s BS advice for the top 3 relationships that struck a nerve.

1. Chink & Chrissy
Why, If I Can Have My Cake And Eat It Too!

If a man sees you as a side chick or mistress, he’ll have no benefit to wife you.  If he already has a wife and is getting away with murder by messing around with you, there’s no logical reason for him to prefer to leave his wife and be with only you.


You probably know of someone like Chink who claims to be separated and in love with you, but drags his feet with filing for a divorce. 

Just like Chrissy, the odds of lucking up and going from Mistress to Mrs. are equivalent to winning the lottery.  I commend Chrissy for being real with herself and visually seeing that Chink had no intentions of getting a divorce. Subsequently, she realized that no divorce papers meant no future for their relationship.

Many women don’t have the courage to be real with themselves like Chrissy and realize that they are living a fairytale and the ending is not happily ever after.  Instead, spare your own feelings and stop wasting time- until you actually see some results worthy of giving the relationship another try. 

2.  Peter & Amina

This one gets a double whammy when it comes to relationship sayings: You Can Take the Boy Out the Hood, But You Can’t Take the Hood Out the Boy. 

This rings true when it comes to men who constantly lie and cheat.  Just because a man marries you, if he was cheating before he married you, what makes you think he’s not going to cheat now?  Is it because you took his status from single to married? 

Unfortunately, a marriage certificate is just that, a piece of paper.  It doesn’t have any magical powers to make people change and take their marriage vows seriously.

But the second caveat to this relationship is the saying: The Way You Got Him Is the Way You’ll Lose Him.  There was strong speculation that Amina was pursuing Peter with knowledge that he was in another relationship.  Sad, but so true, Karma is a Snitch. In relationships what goes around eventually will come back around and smack you in the face.  As women we have to own up to the choices we’ve made that caused our broken heart and find a way to fix it.

3.  Cisco & Jennifer
Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Why do women think its ok to use children as a pawn in this game called love?   Some women think its ok to keep their children from seeing their dad because they’re emotionally fed up with him.  If you’re guilty of doing this, it’s usually a sign that you’re either still in love and acting out of resentment.

I love playing chess with my husband and our first move is typically moving the pawn.  The pawn provides protection to the king and queen (or in this case mom or dad), but is also the first piece on the board that is put in harm’s way and eventually captured by the opponent. 

Playing with love like the game of chess is a dangerous game when you involve your children.  Don’t deny a man the opportunity at fatherhood if he’s willing to take on an active role in his child’s life because of your own selfish reasons.

Consequently, your children end up hurt and full of resentment towards you for keeping their dad away.   So save yourself the headache, put your big girl heels on and learn how to co-parent.

Want more BS tips to help your own relationship, send me a message. If you’re in the Baltimore area, let’s get together and chat.

 

Ladies Love BS,

Adonus